Soliloquy

Somehow things don’t seem headed the right way. It is not even a crossroad- now no more chances to choose an option!!!!!!

 Things seem to have reached a dead end !! It is so end of the world kind.....
Feelings I thought I had overpowered come crawling.... aspirations that never seemed they were start staring in the face all of a sudden. Ideas stifled long ago suddenly spring out from a treacherous maze of thoughts. Treacherous because- time and again they make you fall into traps whose existence you always knew.Answers that are hard to find and more so when you are doing so without questions!! Justifications that are hard to justify..............

Why does the vision seem so blurred?? Why is that I can’t get over roadblocks that have time and again blocked my onward march?Somehow things that have let me down have almost remained the same- only the settings and the protagonists change.

Why do opinions influence me so much?Why do i have to make sense of every innane thing that is said??? Why can’t they just be another passing comment?

Why can’t I look back and put things in perspective? Why the need to commit mistakes, Why the urge to cry at my own downfall? Why the desire to explain things to friends when I know they don’t demand explanations??

Infact why even the need to correct myself........When I know I can get up and run why don’t I?

Comments

Shwetank said…
The clocks are not in unison; the inner one runs crazily on at a devilish or demonic or in any case inhuman pace, the outer one limps along at its usual speed.
What else can happen but that the worlds split apart, and they do split apart, or at least clash in a fearful manner.
~ Franz Kafka

Was missing you all these days in the blog world. Good to see you make the cut. :)
1:06 AM
Manu said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
9:49 AM
Manu said…
I always knew that you are very creative but after reading this i feel that you need to be somewhere else:
Hmmm .. a writer, a generalist, a director and a philosopher ...
..
9:53 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Void

The realization of the void u left was a pain beyond comprehension. Somehow tears seemed the most natural outcome, yet how miserably they failed in bringing a feeling of comfort. It was if they flowed out to remove even the thinnest layer of dust that might have gathered the courage to blur some of the memories. The whole house seemed so silent as if trying to hold back a wail. Every single face trying to hide his tears from others.....n Pa seemed to be the most miserable failure at that. I always taunted Ma-Papa with the fact that they loved u more than me n deepu di....it seemed so very natural now!!! I still remember Deepu di(acting like the wonderful elder sister that she always has been) trying to console me and instead breaking into a wail herself!!! Even the adrak wali chai seemed so incomplete without you. The maid never seemed to make them good enough for me.....n you always would very willingly make them till it was almost perf...
Read more

The Forgotten Remembrance!

He worked real hard to erase all the memories of Aakash from Anindita as well as his life. Aakash and Anindita had been in this relationship for years and Raghav was dead against his decision of breaking up with her. He had always thought they were so much into each other that sometimes they forgot they there were people who existed around them as well. Being the idealistic that he was, he still believed in the concept of undiluted, untainted love and Aakash & Anindita's relationship came so very close to it. He had felt so empty and heart broken on the day Aakash had finally left Ani. He never talked to Aakash after that but Anindita still personified that eternal concept of love and that is why he decided to help her piece together her life once again. It has been 3 long years since that fateful day and he had worked so very honestly and diligently to help her move away from everything even remotely associated with Aakash. He had succeeded as well because it had bee...
Read more

Hyderabad Diaries-1

I have really made a mess of searching for a home in Hyderabad. I always knew that it would be a difficult task going by my prior experiences in Pune, but never imagined something of the kind I am facing here.It has been exactly 17 days now since the time I landed here but an accomodation remains as elusive as one "Mr. Osama". Things don't really seem to be falling in place. Have contacted close to 30 brokers(some even charged me a fee for showing a flat), seen close to 15 houses but the respite seems no where in sight!!First of all there seems to be so few furnished places; assuming just in case you are lucky enough to come across one - the owner(in some cases even the broker) would straight away brand you as an outlaw uttering "Hum bachelors ko rent pe nahin dete". Then there have been so many instances of waiting for a particular broker to turn up and the only thing that he does in the end is call you up and say "Sir, Its raining here, I will show u t...
Read more